With Each Breath - A Journey Through Loss and Grief

"At 28, I was suddenly widowed and childless. Devastated with grief at the tragic deaths of my husband and 8-year-old son in an automobile accident, my life was truly in chaos. I was lost, alone and completely unaware of how to live in a world without them. That same year, I survived not only their sudden passing, but the loss of both my maternal grandparents, two beloved pets, my home, as well as major life-altering surgery. Not knowing which way to go or what to do, I found myself on an endless journey of survival...and exploration."

The above is a portion of the 'Introduction' to a collection of my poetry and photography, titled "With Each Breath", one of two books I wrote some time ago, available in stores locally and on line. Now, all these years later, I am in the midst of re-editing and updating this collection.

Writing 'With Each Breath' initially was a healing process: sometimes difficult, sometimes releasing, always worth the time it took for me to come to terms with this terrible event. Even now, all these years later, it is hard. There is always a hole that will never be filled when you lose a child. Some of the poems are heart-wrenching, some are inspiring, others simply tell the story of how I coped, what I went though, how I felt then...and for years afterward.

My path has not been easy, but along the way I found some answers and learned to accept my life with all its beauty, tragedy and flaws. In time, I also found new love and purpose in my life. Sharing our stories and experiences brings us together, lifting us out of ourselves and allowing a bond of greater empathy, compassion and respect.

The following is one of the 30+ poems gracing the pages of this collection ~


Pears & Roses

In my lovely garden
grows a tree and a rose bush
planted in your memory.
One bears the fruit of three
varieties of pears, the other,
delicately-scented crimson flowers.

Pictures of you
sit nestled among the others
decorating the shelves and walls
of our beautiful home.

On Mother’s Day
my sweet husband gives me a card
he signs with your name.

Every January 9th
I make a wish and softly sing
“Happy birthday, dear Jassen.”

Now and then
you come to life in my dreams
and I wake up smiling…
most of the time.



Are you somewhere
wandering about a garden
full of roses blooming wildly
surrounded by pear trees
laden with fruit?

Do you happily hum a song
I taught you as a child…
and think of me?



It’s a beautiful vision.



That’s what I’m left with,
these dreams and visions,
these memories
of you.

~Brooks Garten Hauschild


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